As is usually the case with the innumerable anti-father misandrists in the media, fathers are demonized while mothers simultaneously rise to the level of sainthood, no matter what the situation, when it comes to divorce, and more importantly, custody.
You don’t believe me? Tell me, when was the last time the media took sides and therefore defended a husband who publicly disgraced his wife or girlfriend by having an affair?
The names are endless, Bill Clinton, Elliot Spitzer, Jude Law, Koby Bryant..Need I continue? I cannot think of one instance whereby the media defended a husband actions after he was caught cheating on his wife. We never hear, “maybe she was controlling, demanding, abusive and withheld sex” etc. Glenn Sacks wrote a great piece on this very issue a while back.
Understand that I’m not justifying the behavior of the aforementioned, I merely pointing out that when it comes to the media passing judgment, the wife is never culpable for what went wrong in a marriage. Rather, she’s always a “strong” and “great and noble woman,” and she’s anything but to blame. Yet on the other hand, the husband, boyfriend and/or father involved is always demonized, and “solely to blame” for the couple’s problems.
In the Basinger-Baldwin divorce, it’s no different. I for one am sick and tired of hearing about “the voice mail” Alec Baldwin left for Ireland. Yes it was wrong, no, he shouldn’t have done it, yes, it was terrible, but so were (and even more so) Kim Basinger’s hateful actions where SHE publicly humiliated Ireland by releasing Alec’s message to the media, and thereby to the world.
That’s beyond despicable, it’s unfathomable and incomprehensible because she wasn’t driven by raging and out-of-control emotions as was Alec when he left the message. No, she was driven by nothing more than her utter and insatiable vindictive hatred for Alec, and that with absolutely no regard for how her deplorable actions would affect Ireland every time she hears that message played in the public domain, and this, for the rest of her life.
Kim Basinger took a very bad situation and made it exponentially worse for their daughter when she hatefully and willfully chose to turn that message over to the media. Like a bullet that’s fired from the barrel of a gun, that message can never be retrieved from the public domain.
Each and every time Ireland hears that message replayed, Kim’s true colors are revealed. Each and every time Ireland must contend with the doubts regarding her father’s love and affection towards her as a result of hearing that message, Kim bears more and more responsibility for the damage done to Ireland.
Alec Baldwin’s behavior although nothing less than totally unacceptable, is far more excusable and therefore understandable than is that of Kim Basinger.
Understanding the frustration and utter despair a father (who is being alienated by the mother) feels, I can empathize with the “why” regarding Alec’s actions. I certainly don’t condone his actions, but I surely understand the frustration that drove him to do it. Kim however, had only one emotion that was begging to be pacified. Her self-serving vindictive hatred, that was felt towards Alex, and that which had to be satisfied despite the harm it would bring to their own innocent daughter Ireland.
I have yet to see one of those talking heads in the media question how such a private message found its way into the public domain. They all pretend as if it magically went from the personal mailbox of a cell phone (one that most likely required a password to retrieve) and onto television and computer screens around the world.
I’ll tell you how if found its way, Kim carefully and hatefully guided it each step of the way, and out of her complete selfishness, did so without as much as caring how it might permanently psychologically damage her twelve year old daughter Ireland.
I understand the frustration and ensuing emotions that are brought about when a father is purposely alienated from his child, and that, at the hands of the mother. What I don’t understand is the vindictive and insatiable hatred that drives a mother to alienate her children from their father.
Ohio Council for Fathers Rights