A Father emailed the following to me:
“I need help with my custody case. My ex is moving to Florida without my consent. She has full custody of our daughter. How do I go about changing this?”
Legal Disclaimer: First and foremost, understand that I am not an attorney, I do not offer legal advice, nor should anything I say on any of my websites be construed as legal advice. That said, I have been involved in hundreds of cases, and confronted numerous attorneys regarding their ineptitude and damaging advice whereby they had the audacity to charge others for the “favor” of harming them.
Out of the entire state of Ohio, I will only recommend one attorney to Fathers and will gladly disclose his name if you simply request it via email. With that, I will proceed to offer you my opinion.
Your situation is not unique, many mothers, and out of nothing more than sheer vindictive hatefulness and without any regard for the best interest of the children will take the child and move them away from the father merely to punish him. It goes without saying that a normal, loving mother who does not suffer from mental illness wouldn’t dream of doing such a terrible thing to a Father, and even worse, to her own children.
The rare exception would be when it’s necessary to do so to protect the child from abuse. However, the radical feminists falsely claim that women do not batter men, and would never disclose the following “FACT:” In 39% of domestic violence cases, males were murdered by females. For more information about domestic violence where women are the perpetrators, please read this post.
Regarding your ex taking your daughter to Florida, It’s hard for me to address your options without knowing the stipulations that were written into your decree. Or, if you weren’t married, your “visitation” schedule, assuming that you have one. Regardless, I’d start saying my goodbyes to my daughter, and if she’s old enough, formulate ways whereby she can contact you.
Please understand that I do not say that to be insensitive, or “cold” towards you, I say that because you are a Father, and many mothers, judges, and magistrates view us as nothing more than an ATM machines, and therefore incapable of playing a meaningful role in our children’s lives. With that, it’s doubtful that the court will be overly concerned about you losing contact with your daughter.
Even if your decree or some other court order prohibited your ex from taking your daughter out of your county, or out of Ohio, or contained some other stipulation whereby relocation was prohibited, she would only most likely be found to be in contempt (assuming you brought forth a contempt motion) and “slapped on the wrist.”
If the roles were reversed, and a Father who had custody (nationwide that’s only true in between 15% and 20% of cases) moved away with his children, and without the mother’s or the court’s permission, an Amber Alert would most likely be issued and he’d probably be charged with felony kidnapping. Simply watch the evening news if you don’t believe me.
Operating on the assumption that there exists no stipulation to prevent her from moving, you could file a Motion to Enjoin so as to secure a Writ of Injunction aka an “injunction” to prevent her from moving away with your daughter. That’s easier said than done as both parties must argue and prove why their position is in the best interest of the child.
That’s an easy proposition for a mother. Usually, all she must do is “claim” (without offering a shred of evidence to support her position) that it’s in the best interests of the child(ren). The Father on the other hand must provide a mountain of evidence to support his position, and even then, given the rampant anti-father bias in Family Courts nationwide, the ruling is not usually in his favor.
As always, my articles are not directed at loving and fit mothers who understand the importance and value of their children’s fathers being involved in their lives. Rather, I direct my words at those mothers who out of noting more than unwarranted, unanswered, vindictive hatred for their ex’s, will use their own children as pawns to punish their Fathers.
They do this by driving Fathers out of their children’s lives by denying court-ordered visitation, and by manipulating the courts into reducing a Father’s “visitation” with his own children to mere “hours” per month. Most of those who engage in such deplorable and despicable behavior do so only to get more child support from the Father. It’s a well known fact that the more parenting time a mother denies the Father, the more child support he must pay for “refusing” to be more active in their lives.
I personally know of a case here in Cincinnati where a Father had his daughter fifty percent of the time and still paid $900 per month in child support to the mother. This in spite of her being more educated than he. She had a bachelors and an associates degree, and he had only an an associates. Moreover, in her last year of full time work, she earned more in that year than he ever had. She took the child support dollars and spent them on her alcohol addiction (she’s an alcoholic and a twice convicted DUI offender) while the child slept on the floor of her apartment for six months because she refused to buy the child a bed.
The Father, despite being bankrupt and nearly homeless spent $50 to file a motion so as to get before the judge and petitioned him to order the mother to but a bed for the child. The judge told her to do so, however denied the Father’s request to order that it be done by a specified date. For nearly three more months, the child continued sleeping on the floor of her mother’s apartment. It was not until the Father in that case filed a Motion for Emergency Change of Custody due to medical neglect, that the mother bought the child a bed. This was not out of her concern for the child, but to make it appear as if she were adequately providing for the girl involved.
What does the aforementioned have to do with your situation? It demonstrates the nearly insurmountable odds you face in preventing your children from being moved away from you. Nevertheless, as a Father, you have an obligation to your daughter to do everything within your means to prevent that from happening. Your daughter needs you Dad.
Ohio Council For Fathers Rights