Posted below is an exchange between a woman named LaTashia, and myself, about her husband who has two sons with an ex that retains full custody of them. This is yet another example that shows just how broken Ohio’s “Child Support” system is.
The ex who receives the “child support” clearly cares nothing about the boys, as they are nothing more than a payday to her. The father involved, named William, represents many of us single/divorced/remarried fathers who are held hostage by and have had our lives destroyed because of “child support” orders whereby the children who are the intended recipients of the money, never see one dime of it and often go without basic necessities.
As a result, the children SUFFER because not only are they not supported financially, more importantly, the suffer emotionally when they are prohibited by hateful, evil, and diabolical mothers refuse to allow them to see or even talk to their fathers.
Adding insult to injury, and in spite of Contempt Motions that are often filed by the fathers for being refused “visitation, the mothers are rarely punished for it. To the contrary, and with regard to unpaid “child support”, the fathers are often incarcerated for contempt. A contempt which is often “indirect” meaning not willful, as in the case of being involuntarily unemployed.
LaTashia’s comment was posted in response to an older post on the Blog, so it won’t be seen by most people who visit the site. Therefore, and as I’ve done in the past, I’ve decided to repost her comment as a new Blog entry given how important her comment is, along with the fact that it’s yet another very clear example of just how broken Ohio’s “Child Support” system is.
Ohio’s Child Support Enforcement Agency (CSEA aka Child Support Extortion Agency ), which claims to be acting, “in the best interests of our children” has levied against William a financially unbearable “child support” order that does NOTHING to ensure that his two boys are financially supported. It’s often quite to the contrary as explained below by LaTashia.
Please note my comments between the lines of yours:
She has had my husband arrested for a bogus domestic violence charges, he has been arrested and served 30 days, and is currently serving 60 days for contempt of court – child support.
[***I strongly suggest that he NEVER again speak to her by phone, in person, or by any other means without having a witness or at least a DVR (Digital Vice Recorder), but preferably both, as she will continue to lie and have him falsely arrested and incarcerated as many times as he allows her to . I used to have a DVR connected to my cell phone and my landline for the same reason, and it saved me from being arrested and incarcerated on false accusations many times. I was jailed once for a lie, and it never happened again after I bought the DVR. Adding insult to injury, no more than a year before I was arrested for her false allegation of domestic violence, a police officer advised me to buy a DVR but I ignored him and I paid the price.***]
He has no guaranteed income- but he does odd jobs to help out in our household with his daughter. The child support order they have set is impossible for him to adhere to. Even when he reported he had no job- he still was held to this ridiculous amount.
[***How much has he been ordered to pay and at what income did they base his support order on?***]
For the 2 years that the children were in our care – he was still being charged child support. He is not allowed to see the children – even though there is a visitation order, the mom refuses to adhere to it. She doesn’t even allow the boys – now 12 and 13 to even call or have any contact with them. We came across them in a store recently and the boys were scared to speak for fear of retaliation from there mother. But when we handed her $200 or their shoes – he was allowed to hug them.
[***I would never give her money directly for multiple reasons. 1. It’s highly unlikely that she’ll spend ANY of it on the boys for the reason you pointed out; and 2. she’s using the boys for financial gain only. Additionally, any money that’s given directly to the custodial parent (and isn’t paid to the CSEA first) is considered a “gift” under Ohio law, and will therefore not be considered to be a “child support” payment. If you can prove that the boys actually lived with you for two years, then he could petition the court to refund all “child support” that he paid during that time. Or, alternatively, he could ask that an equal amount be applied to his arrears ***]
She is using those children to hurt him and for financial gain. From what I am hearing – the children don’t even live with her. If she does not want them – my husband and I do! Can you help? If not, do you have any suggestions on what we can do? Its like we are puppets in a game that is set up for us and him and his kids to lose..
Tony’s comments only below
For varying reasons, I don’t involve myself with peoples cases like I did years ago. I’m not an attorney, but I’m self-taught in Ohio’s statutes pertaining to “child support”, custody, visitation and other family law matters. I had to learn the Ohio Rules of Civil Procedure when I started representing myself as a prose litigant. Prose litigants must also adhere to the “Local Rules of Court” which are additional local jurisdictional rules that must be followed. This Supreme Court of Ohio website contains many other useful legal links. I also have also paid for legal advice from my personal attorney to pass on to others who were without counsel. But unfortunately, that got expensive, and ultimately became too cost prohibitive.
With that having been said Latashia, I will assist you as much as I can. You both seem like two very good people with loving hearts. And William, like many other good and loving fathers, is being prevented from seeing his two precious sons by an evil, hateful, greedy deadbeat woman who unfortunately is the mother of his two boys. And it’s women like her that I despise and that remind of my own case as well as are the reason I founded Ohio Council for Fathers Rights. Sadly, the organization didn’t grow into what I wanted to be for two reasons; 1. People and 2. Money.
If it were within my financial ability, I would happily pay for those like you and William to have representation, but unfortunately that’s not possible. Hopefully, and God willing, one day I’ll be in a financial position to help others as I’ve always wanted to. Until then, I will continue to help people as I have been. Hopefully, I’ll once again be able to get more involved in peoples cases on a personal level as time passes.
It’s both sickening and disgusting how she (the mother) uses the boys for her own financial gain. Many other mothers do the exact same thing and it’s pure evil. Additionally, those same types also enjoy using the children as pawns and weapons to hurt those who love them like their father, his new wife or girlfriend, as well as his family and friends.
There are things you can do, but some require that he go to court, is he willing? With regard to his “child support” order, he can request that an Administrative Review be done by the CSEA to reassess his “child support” order. Keep in mind however that there are rules that govern that process too. For example how long it has been since the support order was last reviewed among other things?
He can also file a Motion for Contempt for her refusal to allow him to see the boys given there’s a visitation schedule. Additionally, he could file a motion to modify the existing visitation schedule and ask the court to order scheduled “phone calls” or “internet visitation” by camera etc. He could also request a custody trial. I realize that some of those options may sound impossible or overwhelming, but it’s not as difficult as many make it seem to represent yourself if one is committed to doing so.
This really is a terrible situation, especially considering the boy’s ages. There are countless studies that emphasize the need for fathers in a child’s life, especially for boys. And yet his ex, who clearly doesn’t love those boys and out of nothing more than pure diabolical hatred and evil, is doing all she can to ruin them by keeping William out of their lives. Above all else, William must not lose hope and should be patient, especially given their ages as sooner rather than later, they are going to assert their right to be with their father like they should be, especially in this case.
In closing, William has options available to address these matters in court, but only if he’s willing to present his own case. if he’s unable to afford an attorney.