After my horrific introduction to Ohio’s “Child Support” Extortion Agency (otherwise known as “Child Support” Enforcement Agency (CSEA) and Ohio’s Domestic Relations (aka Family Court system) the looking glass through which I viewed life was forever altered, and in an unchangeable way.
In truth, it’s really hard to describe. My life at that point simply became surreal. As a person I existed, but as only a shell of what I formerly was. My ‘life’ was monotonous and very mundane, and I had only one goal each day as I dreadfully rolled out of bed (or wherever I found myself sleeping)–put one foot before the other.
The reality and “awakening” of being dragged into the nightmare of playing the part of an unwilling participant in the double-feature horror show otherwise known as Ohio’s “Child Support” Enforcement Agency and Ohio’s Domestic and Juvenile Relations (aka “Family”) court system can only be best described by me as told in the forthcoming.
You’ve lived your life as if were for 20, 30, 40 or so years. During that time, you’ve acquired and formed your morals, norms and mores, and developed your own healthy concept of what life is both in your own personal sense, as well as that of being a United States citizen who “has Constitutional rights.” Rights that can in no way be abridged or infringed upon as you (and society as a whole) agree that they are both God-given and inalienable.
Then one day, you’re served with a civil action and thereby are introduced to Ohio’s CSEA and in many cases “Family Court.” If you were “fortunate” enough to have retained counsel, your initial shock is somewhat minimized. But only in a minuscule way and just because someone else can speak for you. That, as you’re slumped in your chair and merely existing at that point in a quasi-conscious state whereby you ponder ever so deeply how it is that your view of reality itself could have been so utterly faltered as it was, and is. “My God” only begins to describe your profound shock and your equally extensive unbelief.
I can think of no greater shock or disillusionment than that moment at which you realize that “I’m an American, this can’t happen to me” has absolutely no meaning. And to such an extent that not only does it ring hollow, said statement is sadly quite comical within the “Family Court” theater. However, that makes perfect sense when one grasps the finality of the statement, “the ‘best interest’ of the child trumps all.”
In short, you’ve just been introduced to a parallel universe that in most cases only comes to existence at a specific point in time; the birth of your first and absolutely precious child. Although that parallel universe comes to existence at that very moment, it never collides with your sense of reality until in the case of fathers, the mother of your child determines that she know longer wants you not only in hers but more importantly, your child’s life. However, said parallelism exists as such and so close, that the line of separation defining both worlds is unidentifiable. Moreover, it is never, nor can it be breached until said collision occurs. And that very destructive collision is always only one thought away.
It’s at that very moment, when she unilaterally decides that “you’re out”, and although unknown to you at the time, the said parallel universe replaces your aforementioned sense of reality, and in a very emotionally violent manner. And the incredibly turbulent, life-altering and increasingly destructive impact of those two worlds colliding will be felt by you for the first time, when you realize either via your attorney, or the Court or CESA through an order, that you’ll lose EVERYTHING you’ve spent a lifetime building. But most importantly, you’ll lose unfettered access to your children, as well as your God-given right to parent them. Now, the court and the mother of your child will decide if, when and how you’ll see or talk to your children.
And that, and for those who don’t know, is so the State of Ohio and her 88 County “Child Support” Enforcement Agencies can financially profit on the seemingly never ending destruction that will rain down upon you and yours lives for the next 18 to 25 or more years as you’re subjugated and enslaved to a financially unbearable “child-support” order that by its very design, may put you behind bars for years to come.
The absolute worst, most important, and heart-wrenching part of what I’ve described herein is this; all of that life-altering and utterly horrendous destruction that’s experienced by the father will also be experienced and felt ( but in a magnitude that’s exponential in nature) by the innocent and precious children involved. Those very children whom the State of Ohio, the Courts, and Ohio’s CSEAs claim to be only acting ‘in the best interests of’, and who have no say in the matter, and didn’t ask that their world be turned upside-down in the very hateful and self-centered manner whereby just that will be done.
And for what purpose is such ugly decimation and destruction heaped upon not only you, but more importantly your children? Simply because you made a choice to become a father. And it’s for that reason, coupled with the fact that I too grew up without a father that I have this inexplicable compulsion to expose the unconscionable double-featured horror show that’s euphemistically known as Ohio’s “Family Court”system and it’s increasing punitive financial arm called the Ohio “Child Support” Enforcement Agency (CSEA).