Police Indifference Towards a Custodial Father Regarding Non-Custodial Parental Abduction

We received the following plea for help from an out-of-state father a few hours ago:

“My son was abducted to your state and the police barely will help me…I have sole legal custody and have an idea of where he is..can you help?”

This a common request that we receive from fathers, not just stateside, but internationally as well. Sadly, the lack of assistance by the police is quite common, unless it’s a custodial mom requesting assistance after a non-custodial father (NCF) has abducted the children. Often times, when an NCF “parentally kidnaps” his own children, an Amber Alert is immediately issued, a nationwide dragnet is cast, and the “evil” offending father is usually arrested and “brought to justice.”

In spite of the aforementioned situation being a civil matter, many fathers are criminally charged as well. Why does the differential treatment exists? It’s simple, it’s because of the inherent and socially-acceptable worldwide bias against fathers by society, and “the system” itself.
When a non-custodial mom (NCM) engages in parental kidnapping, we are expected to feel sorry for, and sympathize with her, while the father is usually demonized and blamed for “driving” the mother to do it.

When an NCF is the “parental kidnapper” we are once again expected to feel sorry for the mom, while the father is again demonized and further castigated and criminalized for his horrendous behavior.

Usually the motives for kidnapping the children are quite different too. The mother will often times kidnap the children so as to “punish” the father by engaging in Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS). This, by intentionally keeping the father away from his children. However, the father’s motive for doing so is often times only out of frustration from not being able to see his beloved children. More precisely, he’s “had it” with his children being used as pawns after the custodial mom has repeatedly kept his children away from him.

Before I continue, please allow me to clarify my position. I AM NOT a misogynist, and I readily acknowledge that the majority of mothers are very wonderful and loving, caring and nurturing moms. However, understand that Ohio Council for Fathers Rights (and myself) are involved in only “bad-mom” cases with the exception of one member’s case, a non-custodial mom, whose ex (the custodial father) is probably one of the most evil and hateful persons I’ve ever heard of.

Why are moms usually given preferential treatment when they themselves are the abductors, and again when the NCF is the abductor? Sadly, it’s because of how marginalized and how insignificant a fathers contributions towards child-rearing are considered to be by the courts, the press, society, and sadly, by many good and “bad” moms.

NCF’s are mainly viewed as nothing more than child-support-paying “visitors” of their own children. Look at how many women proudly and boastfully announce their selfish decision to become single mothers. How many men boast of the same? Think I’m over-reaching with that one? Think again. More and more sperm donors are being ordered to pay child support to lesbian and single moms by the courts. The only difference is that those “fathers” are merely ATM machines who never desired to see their offspring.

Is it any wonder our society has and continues to degenerate into such a decadent moral anarchy?

Tony Fantetti
Ohio Council for Fathers Rights
Email: tony.fantetti(at)ocffr(dot)org

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